The end of the twentieth century saw a substantial increase in theories attempting to explain natural history within a Biblical framework. The proliferation of divergent models has opened the door to healthy debate, but suggests that more clarity in the foundational issues of natural history would be beneficial for creationism. In the arena of stratigraphy, one of these issues is the role of the global uniformitarian stratigraphic column (hereafter referred to as "the column"): is it a springboard to accelerated progress or a quagmire? If the former, then it allows for the immediate development of mature Flood models. But we assert the inseparability between the column and evolution, uniformitarianism, and deep time. Therefore logic demands its separation from any Flood models. This caution is reinforced by the careless use of the column in some creationist models. Alternative approaches to defining stratigraphy within the Christian Worldview are needed and that work is underway.